Between a Leaf and Some 2-Ply

The speakers don't work in my Jeep, so any drive by myself these days is pretty much spent in silence (well, without music at least, soft top Jeeps are far from silent). One of the benefits, however, is that I am much more observant of my surroundings as I drive and notice things that I might not have had I been jamming to some tunes instead. The subject of this post is one such observation.

It seems there are the marks of construction and "progress" anywhere and everywhere you drive these days. And what inevitably comes along with construction sites? That's right. . . porta potties. They come in different colors, different sizes, and from different vendors. Port-o-Potty, Porta-John, Blu John, SaniPottie, etc. Driving back to school last night, however, a porta john caught my eye as it was named unlike any portable toilet I had ever seen before. It was called "The Comfort Zone." I chuckled at the ridiculousness of considering a porta pottie to be a desirable area of comfort. But without the distraction so readily provided by a simple turn of the volume knob, I did more than just chuckle; I started thinking.

You see, I have become very comfortable with the routine of school. I have become comfortable with the notion that I am in school and there's nothing I can do about it but just wait until I graduate in the distant future. Except that that distant future is here. And though I already have the next step of life planned out, and am incredibly excited about the work I am going to do this Summer, I still can't escape the eeriness of that fact that I will not be returning to school as I have after every Summer for the past sixteen years. Just like that, I will be leaving the so familiar and secure comfort zone that school has become for me. I never really realized it before, but "I'm stuck in school until I get my degree" has been a security blanket for me, an excuse of sorts to justify staying inside of my comfort zone.

I have been thinking about school and my other comfort zones a lot lately, and when I noticed the all-to-familiar porta pottie with the not-so-familiar name my wandering mind couldn't help but start making connections. You see, I would argue that when it comes to answering nature's call, a portable toilet is the least desirable option, as well as the option least likely to offer anything but artificial "comfort." But what's wrong with artificial comfort, really? After all, fake comfort is better than none at all right? No, I don't really think so.. Think about it: cramped, smelly, cold on cold days, stifling on warm days, and the cheapest 1-ply toilet paper on the planet. All a porta pottie succeeds in accomplishing is to make you regret having eaten anything at all that day and long for your truly comfortable and familiar throne back home. But even so, it is still more comfortable than finding a bush to hide behind.... Except it really isn't. That bush doesn't pretend to be a solid, lockable door, and leaves (should you so choose to use them) don't pretend to offer the comfort and quality of your tp at home. It may not be the most pleasurable thing in the world (though if you are a backpacker like me you know it can be, lol) but at least nature doesn't attempt to provide the illusion of comfort.

The point is, our comfort zones are the porta-johns of our life. They are a pitiful substitute for the real thing, and do nothing but keep us from truly experiencing what life has to offer us. The problem is that, for fear of the assumed discomfort of the unknown wild, we so frequently turn back to our comfort zones; even though they are no better, and are often worse, than what we might encounter if we would forget our fears and step out to experience the authenticity and awe-inspiring nature of imperfect life. Whether you are between a rock and a hard place or between a leaf and some quality 2-ply, the difference is the same: you are caught in the middle. And when you're stuck in the middle, you aren't going anywhere, and that highly prized comfort zone of yours is only keeping you from becoming the person you are meant to be.

Confidently Wandering

First of all, the answer is yes: I did steal the title from the title of Brittany Girle's blog, thanks Brittany :-)

I have always liked that word pairing. The truth of the matter is that the majority of us wander through life. Rare is the person with the 12-point plan for achieving their goals. Even more rare is the person who's plan goes, well, according to plan. The reality of it is, we simply are not able to see how things will pan out or why things happen the way they do until after the fact. I think about individuals from history and how destiny seemed to plan their lives for them. George Washington, Matin Luther King Jr., Martin Luther for that matter, Mother Theresa, Ghandi, Alexander the Great, Moses, Jesus, and on and on and on... Think of any influential person from history and history seems to form itself around that individual. What is so awesome to think about, though, is that all these people started their lives, lived, and finished their lives as wanderers, just like us. The truth is, you don't need to have all the answers. You don't need to have a 8-step plan to success. You don't even need to know where you are going in life because at the end of the day there still isn't any guarantee that you are going to get there because we are all wanderers; we simply do the best we can with what we have. What can we can do, however, is be confident in our wanderings.
People get their confidence to live life from a lot of different places. For some it is family, for others friends, a drive for success, athletic or intellectual prowess, and still others faith and religion. For many, confidence comes from a combination of two or more of these things. For me, the source of most my confidence is my Christian faith. I believe that Christ died to conquer sin and death so that He might bridge the gap between God and me that I might have everlasting life. Of course there is much, much more that goes into my faith and the way in which I live my life, but that is all I really need to know to confidently live life. Christ died to cleanse me of sin in God's sight and because of this I am redeemed as a child of God who will one day be welcomed home. I love getting lost when I drive. Full tank or running on fumes, in town or out, night or day, I really do enjoy the experience. Now that isn't to say it doesn't stress me out sometimes, especially when I'm in a hurry or leading others, but I always enjoy looking back on the experience. We can get so turned around, lost and confused without having even the slightest inkling of which way to go next, but the reality of it is we are never really that far away from finding the right path, or at the very least being able to communicate with someone who can direct you to the right path or even come rescue you from your situation. The fact is, no matter how lost you get, you don't stay lost forever. It reminds me of my life: no matter how lost or turned around I get in life, I still know where I ultimately want to go and I can always consult my Bible (road map) or talk to other Christians, and even God himself to help me get back on track. Either way, I won't stay lost forever. You see, my confidence in living as a Christian is not so much confidence of knowing where I need to be as it is being confident that my heart is where it needs to be, so I cant go wrong no matter where I wander to in life. That is what it means for me to be confidently wandering.

John 3, Romans 8, Galations 3